Honestly For You 6

"It's a time issue baby," his mother said from next to him as they left the green room.  He'd gone in there to get his jacket and backpack and his mother had found him on the way out.

"I'm gonna see her tonight," he said shaking his head.  He squeezed his mothers hand as they stopped to wait for an equipment box to pass from the inside room of the arena out to the waiting eighteen wheeler.  It was getting colder and his mother saw him shiver and started to say something, but he leaned and kissed her cheek to shut her up.  "I don't care if it's too dangerous for me to go to the club with her or not.  I don't care about the rain or lightening.  I'm gonna see her when she comes off that stage."

His mother chuckled a little.  "And they say you aren't stubborn."

He laughed a little and pointed towards the ceiling and made a face like he was listening to the last few notes of Wasted Love played.  "I'm gonna be late.  Where's the best place to meet up with her when she comes off stage?"  He knew that there would be an after party that night, but he wanted to see her before everyone got up in her face and gave her a big ego about her performance.  He needed to tell her how proud of her he was and how much he loved her and he hated having to keep their secret from her.

"Go down that way," his mother said pointing in the direction they were headed.  He'd been taken from the outside to the stage and hadn't really explored the place.  They'd played there years before when the group hadn't been that popular, but he all the arenas and coliseums looked the same these days so he didn't know where to go in any of them.  "I'm going to find the Willis's."

"Ok."  He leaned and kissed her.  "Have fun with them tonight and don't party too hard."  He knew that she wouldn't show up at the after party.  She may be the manager, but the club scene didn't appeal to her, even if sometimes she liked to dress like a club kid.

"Be safe honey.  I'm gonna head to LA for the next few days so I'll see you when you get down there next week."  She curled her arms around him, moving aside his puffy down jacket to put her arms around his middle and kissed his cheek.   "I love you."

Justin sighed and looked around for a minute.  It was no secret that he was a mamma's boy, but it wasn't something that he wanted to show everyone.  He'd gotten really paranoid lately about what he did and said in public and moments with his mother weren't want he wanted plastered on the cover of magazines.  "I love you too Mamma."

Todd was waiting for them when they parted ways and he pointed down the hall to where Gritty was walking towards them holding onto Meredith's hand, leading her through the hallway back towards them.  She was taking off her ear monitors and drinking water and he even thought he saw someone drape a bath robe over her as she walked.  He thought that she'd stop to talk to him, but there were four or five people that met up with her before he could get to her and she was rushed by as everyone told her about the show and the schedule and how great everything had gone.

With his mouth hanging open, Justin was helpless as he watched her pass.  He had expected for her to stop or something, but just could only look at Todd for some kind of explanation.  All his bodyguard did was shrug and point to where they'd disappeared into the locker-room he'd just been in Justin shuffled his way back to where she had gone.  "What the hell was that about?" Justin asked.

"I don't know," Todd said with another shrug.  "She's busy.  You know how it goes after a show."

"She didn't even look at me though," he said then saw Todd's expression change.  "I didn't mean it like an ego thing, but it's like she didn't see or hear anything...like all those people around her made her tune everything out or something."

"It happens," Todd said pulling out his phone.  He dialed a number and looked at him, "You guys are like that too...you just don't realize it."

"We are?" he asked.  He tried to think of a time that he'd been that oblivious to his surroundings and couldn't remember a time.  Obviously that was his problem.  If he couldn't remember a time that he'd been that out of it, there must have been a lot of them.

At the door a security guard stopped them.  He was a bigger guy like Todd, but was clearly not part of Meredith's crew.  He wore the local security company's jacket and looked at Justin as if he was some fan off the street trying to get next to Meredith.  He hated instantly the look the guy gave him like he'd hurt her or something and needed to be kept away.  "Do you have a pass?"

"A pass?" Justin rolled his eyes and leaned back to try to look at the guy's face to see if he was serious. "You've got to be kidding me."

"I need a pass or you can't get in here."  The guy put an arm out to make him stay where he was.  Todd had been on the phone talking to the driver and telling him that they'd be out in a little while to leave, but when he saw that the guy had pushed Justin back he shut the phone without saying goodbye and got in the guy's face.

"I'm her boyfriend," Justin said rolling his eyes again as his anger built.  He pulled the two guys apart and stood back.  "Check your list.  I'm the one that was onstage about forty minutes ago.  The one who sang the duet with her?"

The guard's expression didn't change.

"Jesus!" he said loudly.  "Meredith!"  He called out to her hoping that she would come to the door.

Finally her parents showed up.

"Is she changing or something?" her mother asked him as she hugged him.

"I don't know," he said, "They won't let me in because I don't have a pass."

Her mother showed her pass.  "Justin is Meredith's boyfriend."

"I'm sorry ma'am, but if he doesn't have a pass I can't let him through."  He shrugged.  "It's policy."

Justin let out a groan and swore under his breath.

"Justin," Mr. Willis said calmly.  "We'll fix things.  I'll go in and tell her you're out here.  I'm surprised your mother didn't get you a pass."

"It was a surprise so I guess we forgot the little details."  He looked around.  "Isn't Addy here?"

"She went to go talk to Dan about his keyboard or something," Mrs. Willis said, "Hold on...lemme go talk to Meredith and we'll make sure you get to see her."

Addy showed up about ten minutes later magically produced two backstage pass stickers.  "Your mom thought you might need this.  She went to go find her ride to the hotel.  She's jet lagged."

"Thanks," Justin said and put the pass in the guard's face and then rolled his eyes.  "Can I go in now?"

The guard nodded and let him and Todd through.

Meredith was sitting on the couch with her shoes off and her feet up on the couch.  Her face was bright and smiling until she saw him.  Her hands immediately went to her hair and she tugged on it nervously.  He couldn't tell what exactly was going on with her, but she didn't get up right away when he walked in, which kind of upset him.  "Where were you?"

Justin took a deep breath.  "Security wouldn't let me in the door."

"I'm sorry."  She shrugged.  "I swore you were on the list."

"Yeah well I didn't have my pass," he said with an annoyed tone.

She let out a breath and walked over to him, moving him so that they were close to the door and so no one could hear them.  "Don't be such a baby."  She put her arms around him and hugged him.

"A baby?" he asked.  His nerves were shot.  He pushed her away a little.  "Never mind...I was going to tell you some good news, but from the look on your face and from your tone it seems like you wouldn't want to hear it.  My bus is leaving for Portland right now so have fun at the after party.  I'll see you at sound check tomorrow."

Justin saw Todd roll his eyes when his argumentative tone of voice hit everyone's ears.  The conversation in the room stopped and everyone seemed to be watching them.

"Justin," she said, "That's not--"

"Next time I'll remember to get my pass."  He pulled the sticker off his jeans and handed it to her then went out the door.

When he left the room the guy at the door stopped him, "Was it the wrong room or something?"

Justin turned and glared at the guy, but only bit his lip before he looked around and saw the way outside.  He knew that he should wait for Todd, but he was in need of a walk and some cool air so he made his way down the hall towards where he thought his bus might be.

When he found his bus he climbed in and walked straight to the back and slammed the door.  He pulled his jacket off, pulled his sweater off and slacks and hung them up then slid into a t-shirt and nylon running pants and flopped down on the bed.   He could hear when Todd came onto the bus, talking on his phone or something.

"You in here J?" Todd yelled through the door.

"Leave me alone!" Justin yelled rolling onto his back.  He stood up and turned off the lights.

"In a second," Todd said, "Just tell me if you're ready to head out."

"I'm ready!" he growled, "Now leave me alone!"

"Fine!" Todd yelled and a moment later the bus started up and soon they were on the road.


It was almost two hours later when Justin rolled over and found that the bus had stopped.  At first he just thought that he'd fallen asleep and that they'd gotten to Oregon already, but when he heard the blast of hydraulics for the door he knew that something was up.  He checked the clock and found that it was only one in the morning, too early to have made it to Oregon.  If they'd just gotten to the arena they would have parked and everyone up front would have gone to bed, but he didn't hear them moving like they were going to bed.

His head felt heavy and his body ached a little from the practice earlier that day, but he was aware enough to hear voices outside his tiny room.  For a moment he worried that something had happened and that they'd been pulled over for speeding or something, then for a time he wondered if someone was hijacking the bus, but then he heard voices and knew the need for them to pull over.

"He's sleeping Mere," Todd warned with a deep voice.  He sounded angry, but  almost sounded like he expected her not to listen to him.

Meredith?  That was the last person that he'd expected to be on his bus.  He didn't expect them to stay upset at each other, but he didn't expect her to come after him like she clearly was doing.  He had expected her to meet up with them in Oregon after he'd gotten a chance to calm down.

"It took me almost getting a ticket in that damn van to catch up to you so leave me alone ok?" she replied to him and a moment later the door cracked open.

Justin pushed himself up when he heard her moving towards the back of the bus and by the time she'd opened the door he had moved to the top of the bed.  He turned on the light and squinted up at her.  "What are you doing?" he asked.

She moved into the room and closed the door.  She removed her long down jacket to reveal the jeans and shirt she'd been wearing at the end of the show.  She looked tired, but there was also anger in her eyes.  "You left so I hopped in a van and had Gritty drive me to meet up with your bus."

"Where are we?" he asked rubbing his palms over his face.  He would have tried to look out the windows but the shades were closed.

"About two hours outside of Portland."  She began to remove her shirt.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"I was going to get into bed with you," she said putting her shirt down a little.  "If that's ok."

Justin pushed the covers back and moved himself under them.  "I thought you were pissed at me."

"You thought I was pissed at you?" Her tone was sarcastic as she leaned down.  He assumed to take off her shoes because he couldn't see what she was doing. "You're the one who stormed out of the dressing room like a big baby."

"I wasn't acting like a big baby," he said with a pout crossing his arms over his chest.

She put her hands on her shirt hem again to take her shirt off again then removed them.  "What's wrong Beedee?"

"I couldn't get to you," he said simply.  He hated being kept from her.  It wasn't that he just had felt powerless, but he didn't like the idea that something could keep them apart like that.  It wasn't about him being a baby either.  He'd always made sure that she could get to him, or at least he tried to make sure that she able and when it didn't happen he definitely reacted a lot differently than she had reacted to him coming in the room late..

"Oh my god," she said with a laugh.  "You're still upset about security?"

"I'm your boyfriend."  He leaned back then sat up again then leaned back again.  He hadn't noticed until then that his back was aching.  He twisted his back.  "I would have figured that you would have let me in automatically, but I guess not."

Her eyes rolled and then she glared at him.  "You seriously are upset about this."

Justin stared at her, not believing that she didn't take this incident seriously.  He knew that if it had happened to her he would have heard about it for weeks, but she was making it seem like he was some kind of brat for bringing it up.  "Its embarrassing to stand outside and wait for you like that."

"Welcome to my world Justin!" she said throwing her hands up in surrender.  She paced a little then came to lean on the far side of the bed from him.  "You don't want to know how many times that has happened to me.  I've been on the outside of things like that for most of our relationship.  I've sat in hallways in almost all the fifty states waiting for you so excuse me for making a mistake and not having the pass right there for you.  I didn't even know you were coming to the show or it would have been there."

He was about to say something, but when he saw the look on her face he stopped the words from coming out of his mouth.  He remembered that there had been a few times when the passes for her hadn't been ready right away, but he never remembered her being stuck out in the hallway or anything like that.  "You--"

"Yeah," she said and started to take off her shirt again, then slid out of her jeans.  Standing in a bra and underwear she watched him.  "You know I didn't do that on purpose.  Security was tight tonight.  I'll admit it.  It wasn't the best of things, but don't get upset at me.  It'll be fixed tomorrow night--tonight--if you're going to be there."  She looked around a little.  "I assume that this bus wasn't hired for one night anyway."

He leaned back against the pillows and sighed, "I was gonna surprise you and tell you that I'm gonna be on tour for a month or so."

"You are?" she asked.

He nodded and pushed the covers back hoping she'd know that it was an invitation to get into bed.  He didn't want to be a pig or something, but the sight of her like that was making it hard for him to concentrate.

"Yeah," he said when she finally got into bed with him.  "I knew I was going to miss you--"

"Awe," she said, "You were going to miss me."

Justin sighed.  "And it's good for the single to have us on the road together."

"Ugh," she hit at him, "You were almost going to be romantic for a minute."

"What?" he said and slid his arms around her and pulled her over to him.  "It is going to be good for the single."

Meredith moved so that she was straddling his hips and looked at him.  "Why is it good that I'm on the road?"

He licked his lips knowing what it would do to her and she found a smile cross her lips.  His hands slid up onto her hips and he hooked his fingers into the elastic of her underwear.  "Deja vu?" he said,  "We seem to have all our best conversations when you're sitting on me."

"Gross!"  she hit at his shoulder.

"This time we don't have to talk about your breasts," he said moving his hands to touch her chest.  "Although I know I wouldn't mind."

"You're sex crazed," she said.

"Fine," he said and pushed her off him.  He rolled onto his side and pulled up the blankets and pouted.  "You can sleep over there."

He heard her sitting there and could feel her eyes on his back.  He prayed that she would know that he was joking and that things would be ok, but for an instant he thought she might take it seriously and think he was really upset with her.

"Fine," she finally said.  He felt her move and lay down and then heard her moving the covers.

It was funny how moments later they turned to face each other.  They both started to talk at once, but stopped and smiled at each other.  When the bus started up again they heard Todd on the phone and Gritty talking to the driver.  He got up from where they were laying and locked the door then crawled back to bed and pulled her over to him.  His hands slid over her soft skin before landing on spots that he knew wouldn't offend her.  "Am I supposed to not touch you?" he said, "I mean this is my bed and I figure what ever is in it is kind of free territory."

"You make me sound like property," she said.

"I just want you and all those people out there to know that you're my lady and that I love you."  His hand trailed a line from her cheek, down her neck, down her side to have his hand rest on her hip.  "Is that so bad?"

"No," she said with a pout.

"When was the last time we made love on the bus?" His eyelids were heavy and the look he gave her was clearly a flirting look.

"A while ago," she said, "But--"

"No buts," he said placing his hands on her bottom, "Except yours and mine."

She started to twist away remembering the last time she had made love to him.  She'd been extremely tired the next day.  It had been a good tired, but even a good tired could hurt a person in the music industry.  "I have to get up early tomorrow."

"So I'll be quick," he said.

She smiled.  "You really are sex crazed."

He leaned and kissed her cheek.  "It's not my fault that you make me horny."

Meredith lifted her head from where her cheek had been pressed against his chest.  "Do I make you horny?" she asked using the Austin Powers voice.

He laughed and squeezed her against him.  "Do you want a t-shirt to sleep in?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said.

Justin sat up and took off his shirt and handed it to her.  "Trade you."

"You want to wear my bra?" she asked.

"No," he said, "I want to hang it from the ceiling or something."  He watched as she unhooked her bra.  He tried to reach and touch her, but she slapped his hand away then handed the bra to him then slid into his shirt.  Justin threw the bra onto the floor and pulled her close.  "Better?"

She nodded.

"Ready to go to bed?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said and moved so that she was lying with him again.  She lay there for a moment with her face pressed against his naked chest and leg hooked over his.  "I love you Beedee."

"I love you too Bear," he said.  "I forgot to tell you before...I was really proud of  you up there.  I know that I showed up late, but I saw most of the rest of it."

"You did?" she asked.  "I couldn't believe that you showed up...The screen didn't work and I thought I was dead up there.  I heard your voice and turned around and there you were."

He felt her hand slide over his stomach and chest, her fingernails raking lightly over his skin before her palm would smooth over the skin that she'd just touched.  "I'm sorry I had to lie to you about where I was."

"Where were you?" she asked.

"I went to basketball practice with the Seattle SuperSonics." He rubbed her back and took deep breaths, feeling the fatigue of the day finally catching up with him.  "They had closed practice so I hid out there."

"How long were you in Seattle?" she asked.

"Overnight," he said, "I flew into Spokane on a private plane and basically was in the bus until practice then got in a van to go to the arena then hid out until I came on stage.  I was out there for almost three songs before I came out of the darkness."

"You were?"

"Yeah," he said. He heard her yawn and it made him yawn too.  "Bear go to sleep.  You sound tired."

"But I wanna be with you tonight," she said, "I missed you."

"I missed you too," he said and moved to kiss her, "Just go to sleep and we'll ride together tomorrow night down to San Francisco.  We have the whole day off to talk to each other and hang out in bed."

"Ok," she said.  She moved and kissed him once more then moved to roll onto her side, "I wanna sleep on my side...is that ok?"

He nodded and slid over to spoon behind her and threw an arm over her then moved and kicked most of the blankets off them, only leaving the sheet.

"Thank you baby," she said sleepily.

"Night Bear," she said and moved to push herself closer to him.

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